Matthew 1:18-19
This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly. (NIV)

There’s no way around it, and the Bible doesn’t try to paper over it. The way in which Jesus' earthly family was established was prime material for the most shocking and offensive town gossip. Mary was “found to be pregnant”? Joseph was thinking of a secret divorce? What a way for a marriage and family to begin! Joseph and Mary were clearly already under a lot of stress and pressure as parents leading up to Jesus’ birth. The truth is, so were many of our parents. As a result, we often see dysfunction in families carried on from generation to generation because not everyone who becomes a parent is shown how to leave a healthy legacy. When God’s design for the family isn’t understood, or is ignored, it can create hurt and confusion. In Ephesians 5 and 6, Paul writes about the structural order of the family: God is first, and He is to be the priority of the family. Marriage is second, and it’s central to family life. Kids are third, and they need help understanding their rank order of priority in the family structure. When this is out of order, marriages get neglected, kids can become entitled, and hope for the family drains quickly without the acknowledgment of God’s authority and sustaining presence.

Maybe you can identify with a disordered family structure. Well, there’s hope for you today because there were definitely some things out of order in Jesus’ home life as well. But through it all, Joseph and Mary remained faithful. Despite being handed some challenges in the beginning of their relationship and family, they trusted God and continued to be obedient. 

Tuesday’s Reflection

You might find some freedom in letting go of what was imperfect in your family and choosing to begin walking in the hope that a new legacy is possible.