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Jan 20th, 2021
Upstream: Marriage
By: Will Briggs
2 minute read 

Romans 12:9-13 Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality. (NLT)

Let me ask you: Are you a quality- or quantity-time person? I mean, there are a ton of benefits to quality time. The closeness that can develop. The depth of connection, the understanding and sense of priority and thoughtfulness just overflow with so much good. Quantity time has its share of great results, too. The shared time that builds a shared story. Memory making time, over the long haul, that you wouldn’t trade for anything. If you had to choose one, which way would you tend to lean?

In certain seasons, we need to weigh the priorities and demands of life and make sure one or the other happens in a way that blesses our relationship with our spouse. Our choice and intentionality of approach can also bless our friendships and the relationships we share with our kids and extended family.

But ultimately, the cool thing I get to share today is this: We don't have to choose! It doesn’t have to be heavy lifting. It doesn’t need to be complex or difficult. Whenever possible, we can think intentionally and creatively to find ways to bring both quality- and quantity-time into our marriages. Quality time and quantity time can be harmonious in all our relationships. They’re music in the same key. Focus exclusively on just one for too long, and things can get out of tune. But put them together and there’s beautiful music to be made.

Consider pursuing one or more of these in your relationships...

  • Simplicity—Step off the more-is-better ride. It isn’t always true that faster, higher, stronger, or first place is an improvement in your circumstances. How can you declutter your days and your calendar to make room for life?
  • Intentionality—Harmony is when two blend together into one and complement one another. Dissonance is when they just… well, don’t. Make choices and decisions together to intentionally chase harmony—to find it, live it, guard and defend it.
  • Creativity—Set about discovering what you’re not thinking about. Ask around. Look through websites together. Find a couple who is deeply enjoying each other, buy them dinner, and pepper them with questions.

Which of these resonates with you, and might help you bring greater quality and quantity into your time together with the one you love?

Pray for your relationship: Lord, please bring freshness into our communication and help us continue to get to know one another in a way that we fall deeper and deeper in love as the days, weeks, months, and years go by. Amen.