Summer School: “Freedom in Christ” — Tuesday
Galatians 5:1
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. (NIV)
All my life, I had grown up in a Christian home. I remember going to church every Sunday, giving all the “right” answers during small group, raising my hands during worship (even though I didn’t know what it meant), and making it a goal to read my Bible every single day. I had been baptized at a young age, and because I grew up in a church plant, I was serving every single Sunday, from loading in and out of our temporary facility to greeting people at the door. I was doing all the things I was “supposed” to be doing. But from the age of 9, depression reared its ugly head. I remember feeling trapped, hopeless, and angry. I would have random outbursts that varied from once a week to a few times a day, and I struggled heavily and often with suicidal ideation. I was a slave to depression, a slave to the chemical imbalances in my brain combined with the general pains of growing up.
When I got to college, I began seeking treatment for my depression through medicine and counseling. While I started seeing small improvements in my overall well-being and learned how to better control my rage-filled outbursts, I still felt heavy and trapped, and quite honestly, I had zero desire to live. I was convinced that my family, friends, and everyone who knew me would be better off without me.
One day, the Holy Spirit hit me with something square in the face: I had never truly surrendered my depression to Jesus. I had never asked Him to uproot what was inside me. While I had freedom in Him because of His gift of salvation, I was still a slave to my depression. It ruled my life. And while I wish I could sit here and write that my depression disappeared as soon as I surrendered it to Jesus, that would be a lie. But gradually, I began to see glimpses of light. I ran to the Father and begged Him for help. And after finally taking that step of inviting Him in and allowing Him to lead my healing, and continuing to utilize His good gifts of medication and therapy, I was eventually able to experience so much mental freedom.
Today, I can sit here and say confidently that the Lord has freed me from being a slave to my mental health. Don’t get me wrong: There are still seasons of struggle, and days when things seem hopeless. But it no longer defines me, and through it all, I know that my Father is holding me.
Tuesday’s Reflection
What are you a slave to? Sit at Jesus’ feet today and ask Him to free you from whatever it is, and to help you believe that He WILL free you.